Sorry, I’m Not Sorry


After having watched this advertisement of Pantene which unveiled a shocking truth to the world that women apologize more than men, mostly for no reason whatsoever, I cannot help but ponder over the reason liberal use of the s-word by most of the women out there.
It really got me to thinking about the number of times I apologize a day and the reasons why I do that. The result shocked me further, as no matter whether I am in office or at home, I apologized all the time, much more than what I thought, mostly for trivial , dumbest things; and unknowingly continue to do all the time. Although I am not sure about how I am perceived for having uttered those higher number of apologies throughout my life, the advertisement empowered me to keep a check on my emotional and sensitive self, so that I don’t utter more apologies for insignificant things in life. I am not sure if all women have this strong urge to apologize for everything, but the advertisement strongly vocalized the need to delete the unwanted urge to apologize for unimportant things in life.

With its constant use anywhere and everywhere, ‘I am sorry’, has now become almost flippant, and insincerity personified. With an advertisement that clearly articulated about the need for women to stop their frequent apologies, I feel women are responsible more for the recession and flippancy of the word sorry. I don’t know how it turned out habitual in my life, because I’ve always been on the keener side, and hardly landed in troubles that forced me apologize. The apologies that I’ve articulated by far might have come from my mistaken notion that the apologies would give me a way out from the bad situations. But after watching the advertisement, I feel that it hasn’t done anything worth.

Personally, I believe that apologising too much is a result of the incorrect notion that it makes one more polite and likable. Most women do it in the hope that the other person shouldn’t feel bad. In certain settings it may do good, whereas in certain others, it can be the worst move that one can make, and the advertisement echoes this idea that saying too many apologies is a bad idea. Analyze people around closely and one can soon find that blame and shame trickle down a woman’s mind sooner, when compared to men, and most of the times they are absolutely irrational and insensible. We believe that an instant apology is the best way to mitigate every heated situation in our life, no matter whether we trigger them or not. The advertisement exposes this false reasoning and spreads the message of empowerment. While I sulk around the corner to get in to my senior’s cabin, I unknowingly tend to ask, “Very sorry to disturb you. Can I ask you a doubt?” Even if she says “Sure come in. No need to apologize.”, my replied would be immediate, “O.K. I am sorry.”

The advertisement , I believe, is a like a mirror that reflects our own self, and leave a strong message to stand up for ourselves and stop apologizing for trivial stuffs. As the ad ended, I felt I heard a yell and looked around. There was no one behind me, but I soon understood that the yell came out from the revived and empowered soul of mine. It said, “Stop saying ‘sorry’ all the time! Stop being apologetic unnecessarily. You don’t need to do that unless you really did do something wrong, O.K.? Or else the entire world would find that as a reason to prick you for lack of confidence.”

It is time high time to get over with this frailty, and I want to save all my ‘sorries’ to be said for reasons that are rational enough for an actual apology. I want to them all to be said to people who needs sympathy in actuality, as I’ve had this realization, although off late, that ‘sorries’ lose their value when they are overused. Perhaps I should find a more creative way of saying it when I feel that a sorry is detrimental to my own self.

Bottom-line- While some people may start respecting you less for being constantly sorry, some big-headed ones may feel that you are much more conceited than them for not being apologetic.

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